run away?

its official. im taking a loong trip to somewhere, seriously.

sometime when you dig into your own grave, the next thing that pop up was

RUN AWAY

but taking count as i am still a girl and 19 teen still not arrive at my door, so i plan on a loongest trip i could ever imagine.

let just say, life boring me as death and to which i want to ignore few important things in life. and i didnt mention any thing with TWO LEG, TWO HAND, BODY AND FACE okei?

i wanna so badly to scream my lungs out and go to a place where i can start over, as easy as it sound... i really dont know where to start and move on just feel like a great disaster- the same situation like my room kena langgar lorry.

anyway, i dont know how many of my friends still keep a track of me, but feel free to contact my handphone oke?

i might reply late but nevertheless i will try my hard to reply. haha
i meant, hey you cant blame me, cuz i always lost my hp. jeeez.hahaha


signing off.
ahaha

and btw, sab, and jan. i miss both of u so much.

and i miss kak syA.hahaha. i miss talking with u. i mean, chatting.XD

handphone?

i hate HANDPHONE.

kegunaan enset sekarang mmg melampau, cam peristiwa kwn sy mencari sy bile
kredit dy da nak abis tempoh atau bila kredit dy dalam tahap kritikal.


sy memang kurang senang ngan orang camnih.

sekarang kan, byk lah bebudak yang suka gila main msg.
cube korang bayangkan, time dalam bilik kuliah pun tgn tuh sibuk
menaip2 msg and tup tup tup send.

sumpah seranah saya ngan orang camnih, walau hakikat nya
ain pun tergolong dalam orang camtuh.

kenapa handphone atau nama asal dy yang iaitu tangan telefon.
kenapa bukan kaki telefon ke? hidung telefon ke? mat telefon ke?
kan lebey tepat kalau benda alah ini di panggel telinga telefon
kerana, kite gune telinga untuk mendengar kan? atau mulut telefon,
ekoran kite bercakap gunakan mulut and bukan tangan

tapi ironik nya, memang kite type gune tangan oleh itu
tangan telefon pun wujud lah, skrg nih mana gempak da kalau
de enset tp MSG x masyuk OR calling tuh hanya utk BOIfren AND awek dy.

adeii.

korang sedar x, diorang xpun kecoh2 time dorang wat enset dolu2 ckp yang enset tuh utk main msg kan?

saya memang suka la kalau budak yang ade enset tuh kan mesti siap ngan
kamera xmau kalah nya, kena guna yang 2mp dan ke atas
kalau x?

xterserlah ke COOL an mu atau tak kan nya de orang nak pandang

cuz later anda akan dengar ayat2 ini seperti di bisik2kan ke telinga anda..

;eh'eleh beb, pakai enset kamera cikai siot. blah rr.;

camtuh la.

tangan telefon pun mmg popular untuk kegunaan ketara untuk

jeng jeng jeng

CALLER RINGTONE

weyh itu kan benda COOL sekarang, even makcik jual nasi lemak tepi jalan tuh pun,
cube korang call dy MESTI lagu xmau kalah beb, kena lagu hit nombor satu carta hot fm.

kalau x, mane gempak kan?


compare to bebudak zaman sekarang kan, dolu2 tuh sy xpakai pun enset.

pujuk rayu saya x dilayan pun untuk beli enset.

pastuh, de gak bebudak yang memang da mula pakai enset canggih, dolu tuh kan
kalau da pakai yang ber camera tuh. AWAK MEMANG VOGUE gile r.

da xpandang muka, orang pandang enset je. tggu je la enset kena rembat t ea.

form tiga, memang xde la nak de enset2 nih, walaupun ramai da de,
even adik saudara sy yang darjah satu tuh pun da de, tgk la
kesian tol kan sy nih?

ain ain..

pastuh,form 4 mama belikan enset kaler oren 3315. pakai num DIGI.
huhu
pakailah digi ye..
hahahahhaa.

sumpah, saya benci num DIGI, bukan pe, xpham tol la ngan digi tuh je.
xde niat pun nak kutuk2 ke ape.

time form 3-4, memang minat gile kaler oren. haha.
hanya sebab ade sorang membe syg, minat kaler tuh.
pastuh sy yang memang xbape nak active nih PUN trus cube active2 kan diri
hanya sebab budak tuh wakil netball, wakil hoki and sebagai nya.

gile suke.

tapi, nih da lari topik.okie shut up.

tp alkisah nya satu hari nih, balek la sy penat2 dari skola tuh,
tetibe kan sy usya kiri kanan, enset sy da xde.
rupa2 nya....

handhphone first love da kena jual.

cuz mama yang jual.soo..tawakal je la.

ko tetap di hati,my first love enset. kaler oren ke banggaan ku.



mid form 5, aku di kurniakan dengan enset LG kaler itam silver yang siap ngan kamera ngan mp3 player.

enset xde la gempak pun, time tuh saya xminat pun nak men calling ke msg ke,
tolong la jgn send pape, xde nya saya nak pandang enset tuh.

enset tuh setia ngan saya, sampai abis form 5.
flashback kenangan with my lg phone.

time spm tuh ..bawa enset g skola...enset tuh yang teman saya study smpai lewat mlm

okie nih tipu je, enset tuh la yang teman saya wat dajal.
mak suh blaja saya lak sibuk msg kwn saya.

soklan antara hidup mati tuh..

"awk de g konsert tuh ke?"

replied.

"sy kat tempat kejadian, best la..t sy tangkap pic byk2 tjk kat awk."

:time nih,mmg nak thankies die gile2, tp frust abis. cuz

SAPE CAKAP BIOLOGY TUH PENTING HA???!!!
saya lebey rela g konsert malam tuh dari duk umah frust and nangeh 7 hari 7 malam.

pastuh kena paksa baca buku biology,

confession ea.

Saya hanya PANDANG COVER buku kaler ijau tuh ea. sy xnak pun jadi doktor la mama. tengok darah pun sy da rasa pening, nih kan study biology.
tolong r paham.

see, MAMA. MANA ADA AIN BLAJA BIO??!!

ain baca fanfic rated nc17 citer gempak scene mmg ...fulamak.

ehem,okie sambung topik asal....


enset saya, hampir 2 taun saya pakai...

cinta ke-2. name manje enset tuh..

"twigle twigle honey"
hehehehe.

gile ape pompuan nih enset pun de name manja ke?

eh'eleh. bis tuh, name boipren and galpren boleh lak korang panggel

munky la, dunky la.

atau B la. C la D la.

ke name best cam, lolipop and maggie mee ke?

tooth and brush ke?
[ gile seyes, sy xgune name ini cuz tingat someone ke ape.betul.xtipu]



and then. da nak bis taun 2008, akher nya saya maju untuk tukar enset sony ericsson
yang dibeli menggunakan duet gaji saya..

sebenar nya xde niat nak beli enset tuh, idam enset lain.

tapi, camne pun ain not someone who into hp or sms-ing or calling-ain ikut cakap mama. betull.

;okei, semua benda yang di buat statement kat atas adalah PENIPUAN semata2, bajet nak jadi baek nak mampus;

ishh. memang lari topik gile kan?.

yang penting, enset tuh da jadi sebati ngan diri beb, cube bayangkan bile bangun pada satu pagi yang indah.
tibe2 enset hilang..

;okie, g terjun lombong sekarang. frust kan??;

emm. tuh la, da biasa sgt ngan enset tuh,teman makan, teman tido, yang bangunkan kite every morning pun enset tuh gak kan?.
and time frust, enset tuh gak yang ade, utk lap hingus,,calling kwn syg, ..pastuh..yang kite ckp leret smpai ke pagi tuh pun ngan enset tuh gak.


so,....em. xde conclusion pun, enset gile best beb,. AKU syg padamu cinta ke3 ku.hahahaha
enset purple ku syg, ko tetap pilihan.

chehh. pdhal di buat nya enset tuh teruk2. pagi2 alarm bunyi je, trus bang . baling jauh2. siksa enset tuh...ciaann.

ps: penah gak in between pakai enset samsung ngan nokia express music tapi xtahan lama, kalo bukan ilang mesti enset tuh da g travel jauh2 dr saya.\



dear kwn2.haha. saya xhilang la. BUSY je.hahaha. im back^__^

fairy tale anybody?

once upon a time in a flyaway land lives a princess with her guardian old lady,
bla bla bla.
bla bla bla
bla bla bla
and then, the prince come to the rescue, with his whitehorse and oh-so-charming look.
the prince save his princess and he took her to his castle. he take her to the ballroom..
they danced all night long,when the clock struck 12, he knee down and proposed the princess of his live and they live happily ever after..

CUT IT OFF.

this is not a fairy land to where they say. WE SHOULD HAVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER ENDING.
or how they say LOVE LAST FOREVER.

real world, real life.

*sorry, i'm bitter knowing the valentine day is actually next week*

who say guy will love the girl forever? and how they promised all the sweetnothings.

and im bet, even the girls do the same thing.
*still in bitter T___T*

like any other year, this 2009 witness me not having any partner to celebrate it.

in south korea, this is the day where the girls will confess their love by giving chocolate to their loved ones and for those who still single and ready to mingle will eat this black bean paste noodles.

*didnt i sound too obvious?*
ITS NOT LIKE I DO CARE, having anyone by yourside doesnt bring much different. *yea right.wut a lie*

i don't even have a proper person for me to confess gah~yes. i am that pathetic thank you.

i used to believe in fairytale so so much, because somehow it make me so happy.

when you believe the love trully exist, you will serenade your life for it.
*cheeewahh, like i seriously take that.*

back to the reality, when i listened to fly.fm yesterday, the morning crew show. the topic was quite interesting since they were talking about

:does women desperate to have man by theirside?;

agree?

i don't.

YOU GILA APA, DESPERATE?? TOLONG LA, WOMAN DONT NEED MAN TO MAKE THEM HAPPY, diamonds will do.XDD

wakakaka. okey thats not true.

everyone need someone, to share their life. it nothing to do with desperate but more to sharing, caring and love.

ya ka??

i used to believe that too.
all i know, need or not is individual choice, some woman can live FINE without man. but they need baby to maintain their generation, adeeyy .PEREMPUAN.

but yea, with nowadays technology we can have babies without a man. XD

so, are we that desperate, still?

tomboy or pengkid?

Tuesday, December 09, 2008

PENGKID ... WOMEN RIGHTS?

you post this entry a long time ago, but i come across it today as i was google searching for 'pengkid'.

im not sure if it related to my review on them,but i would love to discuss it with you.

that if you allowed me to.

i come from all girl school,to which i was surrounded by tons and tons of girls and you wont find a sight of boys.XD

when i first step in, (i come from co-ed school before) i didnt really felt anything bout the girls, as we are teenagers in growing hormone still changing, some of it trying too hard to impress other.
which how, i think this all started.

some student thought that they look so cool by being pengkid or tomboy.

and they get more attention than anyone else, as they were refered as POPULAR in school.

*noted, i didnt go from the view since they small*

in my school, when you are TOMBOY or PENGKID, student look up to you and trying to be as close as they can with that person.
and you will often see the sight of a girl passing gift or secret admiring notes to the pengkid.

they giggle and almost faint if the pengkid reply back or even smile back at them.
[seriously, thats how crazy they can be when they so much into the pengkid]

[a/n:* i had some goood time doing this.hahaha*]

you will be declared as popular as well, if you are related to the pengkid.
may you are her GF or PET SISTER.

LOL.

in my case, i close with most of the girls, regardless how tomboyish they may look or how boy-ish they may seem to be,

*sorry for my grammar mistake,*

since, for me. we are all friends. and more important, we are human and girls.

when i was in form one, i was close with this tomboy who i later on realize. she was doin all those boyish act because she wanted to protect herself from getting bullied.
and she did cost alot of problem especially fighting in school.

im not sure if i should sympathize or console her to be girl back since, my heart beating fast whenever she come close.

sometimes, i have the heart to tell her off,but most of the times, i thought she look fine bein herself which is tomboy-ish. she look so cool that people are jealous that i close with her, and yes. i love the attention at that time.

i realize that when you are in all girl school and lack of boys for eye-sight view, eventually you will get attracted by the same sex.

especially those who act like boys.

you will start wondering if and only they were boys.*gasp*

they were oh-so-perfect. look at those stylist jeans or how they do their hair.

i shall admit, that was the best part when you are in all girl school, those view are trully eye-sight.hahaha

i did a survey about 3-4 years ago, and i found out. each student will at least have ONE FEMALE CRUSH on a normal looking GIRL or THE PENGKID/TOMBOY.

im not sure the main reason behind this, i tend to kept a distant from people judging me all lesbian even if the student do not mind bout this issue, the teacher thought it different way.

it was a sensitive issue for someone like me. and i guess, im the only ONE who feeling like that?XD

yes,i did.

i mean, in my second year, which was form 2.

there is such rules as 'YOU CAN'T HOLD HAND WITH SAME SEX.'

and you can hear all those mocking like ' no way, she is my BFF.' or ' GILA APA cikgu ni?'

yes, they might not aware of the things they might cost by doing this.
teenagers tend to BREAK THE RULES. when you say you cant do this, thats when they get so hyper up and will go against it. the hormone, thank you.

things either turn bad as it sound or things will get normal. to which i believe,even I get a bit aroused by this issue.

i had a secret crush to a person for one whole year, same class with me.
i didn't do anything crazy of course, i just will stalk her every now and then.XDD hahaha

but yea, thing just passby like that, and i get to know more about this issue in my school.
and i swear, people will act normal like this is sooo NORMAL.

in my third year, i become closer with few girl who appear to be boy-ish but very much girl-ish inside.

and with all the peer pressure i was facing at that moment, they accused me.

*finally somebody taking this issue, seriously*

with the words like. YOU ARE LESBIAN. and things goes on like that.
but what make me upset was, the person who ACCUSED me was the one who SPREAD the LESBIAN thing among the student.
the same person who get caught kissing. * and yes sir, im not kidding*

some awareness.

i felt so bad and my reputation was on dead line, i decided that i shall not befriend with that boy-ish looking girl.
and i still feel very sorry for doing that to her, must hurt her so badly.

the following year, things went okey for me until my close friend start to developed feeling toward one of the tomboy in my school. she ask me if i ever get close with any tomboy and all those piped up question.

i almost couple thou.

and they continue to have the relationship right infront of me,but i didnt take any action knowing it was indeed wrong.

again, i blame the hormone.

same year, i get a little too close with one of my classmate which apparently is a tomboy.

but we keep the relationship outside the school,as we did 'date' several time for the whole year and sometime she will wait for me at school or things like that.

if she is a he, this will sound sweet.

the same year, i got involved in many tomboy's.
i regret this part.

even some of my pet sister is boy-ish looking type girl.

which lead me to another year, my final year in school almost graduating from my high school.

this year was tough,not only because i was expecting SPM but it also the golden year of my last moment at my precious school.

*eventhou' many bad thing happen to me while i was studying in here, i still love it like it was my 2nd home,do trust me*

this year, i get many threaten letter from my friends, those who i called my dearest.
which i can't believe they wrote such letter.

one of the letter i most remember was, the one that says me bringing bad culture and influencing other on this issue, to be specific; they say im the one who make other girl to be lesbian.

seriously, i done nothing to them and i swear i didn't couple with anyone.
and yes, i might have friends who couple and change couple but who am i to PREVENT them from doing it?
i tried and keep on trying until SPM but, if one person is so much in 'love' with another, you think i really have the power to wake them up and tell them GOD. "THIS IS WRONG??"

that year bring a lot of pain in my heart,since it was my last year also become the year i hate the most and love the most.

they were pointing finger at me.

and i kept my word in silence, i do not want to speak another word.

and therefore i realize, some people are just too jealous that in that kinda school with that kinda environment, you just need that so-called attention.

i am no where to blame.

eventually when the year almost end, they crawled to me and apologize.

this issue actually quite predictable in every girl school. i over-heard my teacher complaining about how our school reputation is dying when two girls from different school start a fight over a tomboy from my our school.
this should be a great news highlight.
and most of the story remain mystery. nobody want to tackle this issue from any school,its totally humiliating.

but the reason im writing a long-than-my blog kinda email to you was, i found this issue very much interesting.
its not because im from girl school or how i got involved in this but more to, how come they want to be like this and all other unknown reason. * you dont need a specific reason to like something right.hehe*

and i do know few people who claim theirself as NOT TOMBOY but eventually, they WERE ACTING LIKE ONE.

seriously, they can lie or pretend all they want by saying how innocent and how this act may cost a humiliation to their family but in the end, they the one who did this.

i wonder why.

because, recently i found one who start everything with me and in the end she say, she is not the type.

a dual personality maybe?

only she knows the answer, and i wish i can interview her on this.XD
haha

if and only this was my assignment.XDD

anyway, i had great time alone sharing this with you.

this won't have any moral value behind but somehow, this is the journey of a girl who faced this issue. and yes, thats who i am.

haha.

thank you for reading it.

im a real person by the way.

XDD