se tapak.?

saya dah pulih.ahax, i goin to be okey.

mood* tengah berusaha untuk menjadi normal.

bila rasa ku ini.....

maybe sometime, its better to ignore everything and pretend you are fine,

because

sesungguh nya, saya terlalu lemah untuk menerima tamparan hebat

may it from my own best friend or even the past people in my life.

yes, hati ini dah terlalu hancur.

"mengertilah, betapa hancurnya hati ini. cuba rasa apa yang saya rasa."

should i cry now?

running away from everything really won't solve anything.

and its crucial i remember everything dari awal sampai akhir.

DIA.

awak punca semua ini, awak penyebab utama saya dah kehilangan semua.

thou, i do realize saya memang do not want to blame myself for this.
instead, i blame you.

i lose everything

my home

my family

my trust

my hope

my dream

and now

i lose one most important thing in my life.

my dear life.

its hate to say this toward my own self.

do you know how difficult i have to go through just to pretend i OVER you?

i dont have any feeling for you, no more. or how people start to look at me like I'm a devil send from hell?

regret?

its that even a word?!



now. saya betul2 dah tak berdaya untuk meneruskan semua ini.

i swear.

please, whatever happen in past or happening now.

i pray.
please. go away.

i dont wish for another heart breakin news, its already have a huge hole in it. cant you see?

saya sangat2 tertekan.

my head feel like exploding.
where goes my spirit?

where goes everything that i hold on to?

question left like that.

i want to runaway, go far away. i don't want to stay in here.
please.

goodbye,

ain depress AGAIN?

i'm haven't officially back.*noted*



goodbye february and welcome march. i've 100 upcoming birthday list waiting to make a hole in my pocket.



;shut up ain;



did i tell you that i'm havin a depression? *again, and again*

well only this time its a bit different BECAUSE i am so into CLEANING MY WHOLE HOUSE.



sumpah gila.



dari kain buruk hingga ke tempat letak pinggan, semua nya saya da pun cuci.



its like an obsession, and i can slept at 1-2 am everyday after cleaning the whole house and then i wake up early to clean it again, and kalau boleh saya memang nak kemas rumah jiran2 saya tuh sekali.



gile sepah. pagi tadi saya sengaja buat2 macam nak greet diorang pada pagi yang indah, fuuhhh



macam nak je masuk and kemas semua.



begitu la sikap ain yang tengah dalam depression.kthanxbye.



tapi, walaupun saya tengah dalam depression selepas mengambil hiatus yang agak panjang( ceh, padahal cuti seminggu je kot.)

saya tetap kembali untuk post more entry in this blog. unknown.LOL



rindu tak kat saya kawan2 semua??



;seriously, i can shut up now.;



saya terpikir pasal this thing early last night.

my first ever trip to pahang.



*flashbackkk*



ain: waaa.kekawan...aku dapat PLKN kat ......*dalam hati, ingat kan perkataan yang kurang sopan..rupa2 nye nama tempat...*



Jia:Mana?

Ain:..tuh...tuh..yang mula dari G tuh...end with NG...*ntah pape r ain mencarut*

jia:......*pandangan manja yang sgt bahaya*

ain:sigh*give up* kat GAMBANG,

jia:huh?

ain:ntah la. aku tau kat gambang...area pahang.

jia:O.o

*end of flashback*

huh.something like this la basic conversation ain and jia.



Saya pun melangkah keluar dari pintu rumah sambil memberi pandangan terakhir kat tv, cd and sofa kesayangan .

*dengan hati yang berat*



*switch back to english please, BM sumpah failed!*



and i reach at bukit jalil, teringat kat abang handsome yang jaga bus PLKN tuh cakap kuat2



:ehh,....bagus r. awk punya beg lebih besar dari awk...;*evil laugh*



(cis.. hanya sebab dy abang handsome, saya pun tersenyum malu, konon cover r. cuz sumpah semua orang pandang saya time tuh. gile malu. cam nak merangkak masuk bawah bus tuh je.)



takpe, hari ini hari dy, esok lusa siapa tau kan? wahahahahhaha sumpah kau mati di tanggan ku selepas ini. ( evil master plan in mind*noted*)



apa perasaan saya selepas memijak bumi pahang?



i must say, i was so in culture shock.

al maklum la, orang pun berasal 100% dari Key Hell tuh. *saya tak rasa BANGGA pun ea*

cuma, saya nih terlalu biasa duduk kat KL je selama ini, thus i felt so outkast standing there..in kuantan.

seriously, at that point of time, i wish i can run back to KL.
konon terlalu bandar-ish.

i don't know why but somehow i want to go back to those places.
did i say, i dont even have a kampung? therefore i spend my lifetime here in KL?
i sound that pathetic.T____T

well, ain kalau la awak sedar kan. sekarang pun awak tinggal kat kampung kan?
kampung baru air panas. (diam la ain.)
itu nama tempat tinggal saya yang tidak begitu famous ea.
rumah tinggi tinggi mencakar langit and bumi.

living in pahang was great, i can watch star every night sambil menyanyi lagu
'oh my pretty pretty boy i love you.' or 'i never had a dream come true'

(kalau suara macam beyonce ....boleh r..nih..suara cam kucing xsempat nak beranak je.
diam la ain)

but anyway, im sure missing it all now. and of course, i wish i can travel more and meet new friends people in every go.




there always be a reason why this world is sphere and not rectangle or square kan?
because, only when the world is sphere we can meet another person in another point.

get me?

ain sumpah tengah mencarut mengarut nih.

saya tengah banyak berangan untuk menjadi someone.

fuhhh

and im currently in love with 김현중. wait, i think my whole family in love with 김현중. damn it.

saya tiada point untuk post anything today but seriously im boring to death and i just need to space out by doing something that not so important right now. and teaching is F.U.Ndamental
saya dah pun sakit mental.thenkiu

sila save the earth please!!!! global warming. (sumpahseranah ain yang betul2 tiada kaitan dengan tajuk asal and topic yang sgt tiba2 dan random. ain sila terjun bangunan.)

okie this might catch your attention.

SAVE EARTH PLEASE, THIS IS THE ONLY PLANET WITH CHOCOLATE.

okie okie.
'ain signing off'

today is a history.

yesterday i watched changeling, since it was based on true story, little to i know, i was so touched.

yes. i did. angelina jolie was super hot and her acting with that look in that movie seriously
CANTIK MENARIK TERTARIK KAU MEMANG D BOMB.

serious.

i love the movie, eventho i plan to watched 'the curious case of benjamin button"

KONON BAJET MACAM, I KENA WATCH BRAD PITT BEFORE ANGELINA JOLIE.
blar r ain.

friends is like wind? im not sure how to classify them into one word, but im very sure.

they are the most hurting weapon and blady war in this world.
i am blessed with those sweetfornothing kinda friend whom i heart dearly.

but i also was 'blessed' with those who will break my heart with every chance they have.

okie, i know i am someone who hard to handle and i am difficult.

but, i thought that what friends are for? we stand together and compliment each other.

like shoe and the heels?ahahah.XD i dont know if this make enough sense.

or how they connect a tooth and brush? fuuuuuhh

*tiada niat pun nak guna toothbrush sempena nama sesiapa in specific ea*

itu kan kawan?

betul tak kawan2 ku?

my heart eventually break into pieces, and i hate all of them.
im sorry,i know i am somewhat they called as pessimist?

sometime, you just need to be oh-so-grumpy before you wake up and start being happy again.
and what important was, these heartless people NEED TO GO.
yes, please leave and dont turn back.

i will regret this every now and then but i also will smile because i deserve to be happy?

friends.

valentine again, stupiacc punya valentine, ntah orang tua mana pulak tiba2 satu dunia nak sambut birthday dia. (hanya sebab ain TIADA date for hari kasih sayang* kan lebih sedap di panggil hari kasih sayang, takde makna nye sambut birthday valentine tuh. percayaa lahh*insert lagu siti.XD*)

cis.

baik korang ingat tarikh keramat ni.

25/08/2009. itu lah TARIKH yang patut DI INGAT.

;shut up ain;

okie. do you guys know who is YUNA, she is the student from UITM?

please please listen to her music, her indie kinda voice really soothing.

one of her single is "deeper conversation"
i won't be able to put her single here, but please google search it or listen to it.

i am still moody since yesterday, i hate everything that happen to me, and i hate how i have to witness my ex came online since WTF Ain.
suka hati dia la nak online ke tidak,

tapi hati still saket seyh.belom cukup parah lagi,bila tiba2 leh teringat pasal dia.

hati tak nak fikir tapi macam melayang2 pulak semua kenangan itu.
*tolong r ain...*

ciss. HIDUP AIN SANGAT KUCAR KACIR.

hidup ain telah pun di terus kan, walau susah macam mana pun,
saat penyesalan tetap ada. cuma sekarang saya belajar untuk tidak terus2 rapat dengan siapa2 atau terlalu menyalahkan diri sendiri.
bila rasa bersalah, apa2 pun yang ain buat rasa macam tak betul and tak dapat buat pun.

ain pun membawa diri masuk bilik, layan lagu jiwang,emo tahap cipan. terima kasih.

i fcuk hate it. *opss*

omigosh, i realize this entry is mixed between english and malay.

*waaa.bahasa omputehh ku...*

apa plan ain lepas nih?

study je la.

*tolong la jauh kan perasaan malas dari dalam diri ain. cheeeeeeeeeh*

erm, teaching is supposed to be fun?
i hope so.

so teaching english won't be that hard, i just need to do some research on how i going to teach them and also how i going to improve myself.

and then, i going to re-deco my room.

actually,after everything happen, eventho sometime it makes me cry but most of the time, i can laugh whenever i think about my ex.

not because my ex was too funny.

but, THIS WHOLE THINGY WITH MY EX WAS ADORABLE AND FUNNY.XD

okie, you can call me stupid,*those who know about me and my ex je la*
and for everyone who involve in this direct or indirect also make me laugh
(ada rasa macam nak tergolek2 atas katil and buat aksi macam sin chan ketawa)

serious.

well, they are part of my life. WAS.

now, buat2 macam bahagia je la.

i don't need anyone like so-called couple to make me happy.

saya sorang2 pun dah cukup bahagia.huuuuu..konon.

and jom buat orang lain bahagia.

heee. misi membahagiakan manusia.

i plan to watch at least 3 movie alone and then go trip alone outside KL.

maybe pahang? perak?

don't know yet but. i will go.

hwaiting ain!!!!


ps:ingat kan kalau buat colourful font camtuh boleh buat blog nampak KONON menarik. serious, cacat. adeyyy. sakit mata x kwn2?XDD

tajuk entry pun memang gila bodoh. nampak sangat takde kaitan pun.

sy mmg suke blog, so wut???

semalam,hari ini dan esok.

apa kaitan sume nih?

*sume ny hari2 yg sy terpaksa keje, uwaaaa..nak nangeh sy T____T*

selama hampir sta0n lebey sy keje, akher ny sy da sampai ke thap ke bohsan nan yg sy xdpt nak gambar kan melalui kata2.

adeyy.


sy sedar diri sy nih hanya la manusia bese, yg sering membuat kesalahan dan melukai hati org len.

dan,sy trime sume org dgn hati yg terbuka luas.

sy di tanya pd pg yg indah td, perlu ke awk blog setiap hari?

xbosan?

menarik sgt ke apa yg berlaku kat idup awk tuh??


look *huaaa.omputih ku suda kuar.XD*

hidup kan x ber asas kan luaran semata2.

awk ingat hidup ber landas kan outing? or peristiwa2 best seperti men baling2 selipar or tampar2 itu sahaja yg di kira sbagai

:WOW, HIDUP SY SGT BEST DAN MENARIK HARI INI;

camtuh?


kalo idup hanya nak pandang benda2 besar camtuh baek awk g terjun lombong and tolong jgn call 911 or 999?? for the rescue. xberbaloi betul.

*itu ka talian penyelamat kat malaysia? FAIL duduk malaysia.ADeyyy*

hidup, mcm2 yg kite boleh buat.

kalau kite nak la kan, benda cam tgk spiderman lalu tepi tingkap tuh pun dikira best ta0.

itu cara utk appreciate every finest thing in life. and stop complaining why MY LIFE COULDNT BE BETTER.

*ain, sile renung2kan ayat di atas itu ea. sgt sesuai por eu*

sy di tanya lg.

benda kecik yg camne tuh ain?

erm.

for me la kan,

sy cepat excited.
cam nga jejalan epi2 kat luar tetibe ternampak bunny lak, gile suke.

leh terlompat2 ngan wat aksi kanak2 riang yg dpt ice cream percuma.


atau,

sy nga tension pandang reflection muka sendiri kat cermin tetibe lalu lak membe syg..haaa.

trus sengih2..gumbira nak mampus

itu hidup.

expecting the little thing in life is better than expecting the biggest thing.

every big thing start from small,no?


atau time g keje, terjumpe rm1 kat jalan, waaa

;ain, sungguh lucky la.XD;

rm1 je pun, bukan ny sejuta. gitu?

tp, sy gumbira, sbb benda kecik camtuh yg wat sy eppi.

dan sy boleh je blog more bout this.


so, hanya outing secara besar besaran atau hari ini sy telah di naek kan pangkat sahaja dikira sebagai HIDUP ke??

ntah la. ini sekadar statement sy je pun.
sy rasa hidup tuh satu jalan yg pjg tp exciting.
sbb, kite xkan ta0 pe yg kite bakal tgk or jumpa. dan sy rase sgt la excited lg utk pk, maybe one day, someday

ain akan jumpa benda yg dicari2.


sy juga xske la pk sal ape yg bakal org len pk, terlalu bohsan.mcm xde hidup lak.

*another statement, ain ingat yg nih gak.*


asal kan sy eppi and asal kan sy dpt buat org eppi sy dah cukup BAHAGIA.

world need love to be better place.

kenapa sy blog?

sbb sy nak blog la mangkuk. leh x jgn byk tanya. kalo xpuas hati sgt, g la buka blog sendiri.

menyampah t0l.

ke awk jelez, sy blog byk2?huahuahuaa

w0key la. kan xsal2 sy da stat kutuk2 dy me nambah dosa je.

bukan ke ain nak buat amal skrg??

heee.

BERITE terkini, AIN RINDU KAT ANNE. wut??!!!

sy blog dlm bm ea.^^

geram tol la ari nih.

pg td sy da kuar awal, malam td sy tido lmbt.

sgt xcukup tido.

pastuh

ari nih bos sy yg memang ayu itu suh sy habiskan event dy,

bayang kan perasaan sy

cukup cedey. *aksi sayu yg melampau*

tp

sy semangat nih...konon nak habis kan keje

td tuh sempat la nak g toilet kan, nak posing maut2 lak dlm tandas tuh


adek2, jgn cube this at home

gambar2 yg bermotif kan MANGKUK TANDAS DI BELAKANG, sgt la TIDAK MENARIK.

sila amik perhatian.

even, gambar pintu toilet terbuka pun sungguh tidak cun.

walaupun tuan punya gambar sudah cukup cute.

so, sile renungkan bersama2.

3
2
1
okey cut.


pastuh, da posing lebey2 walaupun sedar mangkuk tandas kat belakang tuh lebey cute dr sy, sy tetap posing gak.


koleksi peribadi.


sy pun g la balek kat opis sy yg konon vogue tp xvogue mana pun.

rasa cam nak baling sandal sy je

ahhaaa

teringat sy.

pagi td la kan, nga jalan2 rush gile nak tangkap bus nye pasal, sandal sy TERBUKA LUAS KAT area TAPAK tuh.

fuuuhh


baru nak cover comey, trus rosak image.

geram tol.

this is w0key lg.

td sy call la sorg pompuan nih, gile benggang sy kat dy.

kalo dy kat depan sy, konpem da kena baling pastuh sy ketuk2 dy..eeeeee

GERAM GILE.

org ckp elok2, jwb la balek elok2

nih tidak.


sesuke ati dy je.


its not even FUNNY okies?

duhhh

wutever la

sy arap, cita2 sy nak jd guru bahasa inggeris akan tercapai.huahuahua


mcm layak je ain nih

kalo la sy yg ajar, kesian markah diorg. turun secara mendadak.wakakkaa


tp itu bukan point utama sy,

hari valentine yg org barat sgt bangga kan tuh is around the corner *wakakka, massive turning point.*

sy xde r benci ke ape ngan hari valentine, walaupun sbnarny benda ini tidak di galak kan sgt.

itu pun kalo la ade TEMAN utk celebrate sesame kan,

leh gak tunjuk kite nih caring ke ape...

TP sy mmg benci hari valentine, terima kasih

*cheh, hanya sbb dy xde teman ny pasal. adeyy*

hari ini, anne reply msg sy.

pmpuan itu takes forever utk reply.

kuciwa je ngan dy.

harap2 impian sy utk jd guru sementara akan tercapai.

ye la, dr sy buang masa sy dok memanjang kat opis nih

da nak muntah sy tgk opis nih.

gile bohsan

xtahan.

sy buat keputusan utk mengajar je.

dolu2 tuh

bebudak jiran suke lalu depan umah..pastuh jeritt


; kakkkkk aaaiiiiinnnnn........'

walaupun rasa cam nak sepak2 je diorg ; kuat gile, lari anak kuching dgr diorg jerit2 camtuh kalo suara cam dbsk ke, siti ke leh gak trime, BUT pas tgk muke cute diorg yg punya semangat memanggel2 name sy...terus....ter sengih sorg2

ye la..


sy kan popular di kalangan bebudak.


sy nak cari amal ngan mengajar.huahuahuaha

*nampak sgt xcukup wat amal..T___T*

haizz.


berbalek citer td.

serious r.

sy rindu kat budak tuh.


skrg nih, asek emo je.

pantang rindu seseorg.

mmg akan nangeh.


ini dipanggel ape ea?

sindrom rindu rinduan?

ke, sindrom pas break up trus frust menonggeng xdapat trime kenyataan therefore, sesape yg di ingat and konon di rindu rindu nye AKAN trus nangeh? camtuh ka??


blah r ain.


sy da malas nih..event pun da nak siap.

sy xske la...adeeyy

kakak yvonne, nak sy bantu ke buat event?
hahahaha

sy lebey ceria di AMCHAM, thank eu.


k la. tuh je.